Goodbye Paul.

Well, I had this friend Paul, and he used to be one of my best friends. Then we slept together and he did a lot of shit that really hurt me (emotionally), and it just has never been the same since. We haven't actually talked in quite awhile, but since moving here I decided to try and bury the hatchet and rekindle our friendship. I sent him an email last week, just saying hey and asking what he was up to. He replied tonight, telling me that he did not feel that things could ever go back to being the same between us because of something I had said to him 2 years ago. Apparently, he said that I said I wanted to drug him, rape him, and have his baby. Let me just say, for the record, that I have no recollection of this. I cannot even imagine a situation in which this alleged conversation could have occured. The only thing I can think of was this one time I drove up to Flagstaff and took him down to Tucson and then Patagonia to see his parents. This was at the height of my problem with bulimia, and admittly I was certifiably insane, but I don't remember saying that. I am just so upset about this whole thing, first and foremost because if this has been bothering him for 2 years, why didn't he say anything sooner? Also, because I honestly don't think I ever said that. But, that doesn't change the fact that our friendship is over forever. It's sad and ironic, because this whole time I thought I was the one pushing away from him...